Monday, November 7, 2011

10 Evil Ways to Get Revenge onyour Ex

1. Pour bleach on His/Her grass :) -- it will never grow back, you can write something like dick, bastard, slut lol it'll kill the grass in that writing, or kill it all!! (that's the only killing allowed)
-be prepared for possible arrest if caught


2. Key his/her car - whoa Ive been in school & a lot of people have done this!! it's sooo hurtful. My cousin got a new bmw & parked it, and some haters keyed it for no reason.

it's easier than going Shakira on his car - like at the end of her "Dont Bother video"

3. DO NOT light their clothes on fire ala Left Eye from music group TLC: The house caught on fire, and he forgave her though, world news & the cops got involved


4.Paint & Eggs: My 1st year in college some guy cheated on his gf, and she threw eggs on his car! and spray painted DICK on it!! the cops got involved but no one ratted her out, and I heard its super expensive to fix!---Eggs damage the paint, & by painting the car she fucked it up some more. info


5. Public Embarrassment through Mobile & Internet Connections etc: In my High school (9th grade/ J.s.s. 3) these immature boys slept with girls (that was huge we were all saints) and these boys decided to draw all of them, birth marks etc and post it all over school.

Fast forward to the modern age, now a bunch of people create facebook, hi5, myspace pages saying what type of slut one is, and fwd naughty pictures of the person via email and cell phones. or create a blog on reasons why not to date him or her. send a stripper to their house to perform on xmas day.


6. Dontdatehimgirl.com a website dedicated to help women avoid dating assholes. where women write about the horrible guys they dates, some have names, states, cities, pictures and their experience.

7. Email/ Magazine Spam - add his/ her email to a bunch of crappy email newsletters, so he can get a bunch of spam for how to enlarge your... or stds... yeast infection... spam, spam, spam. or better yet as suggested subscribe to a CRAZY sex magazine & let it "mistakenly" go to their neighbors address


8. Throw all their shit out! salvation army, pond by your house, just outside, maybe in trash bags a day b4 the garbage guy gets there so he has a day warning to pick up, if not goodbye!

It's Juvenille so better do it this year so u can mature in the coming year lol. but honestly I think revenge is bad, but when someone is really really hurt they think this is the resolution.

9. Fake Obituary: Killing Him... Well Sort Of-- Make an obituary for him in the paper, maybe say he died of some std or gruesome accident (got no. 9 of this list of revenge)

10.Success - become a way better person, reinvent yourself, after a divorce, a break up, a bad friend, cut them off, and build yourself, spend money on a makeover, hit the gym or get p90x exercise program, clear your acne with a presciption, get a better job!! make yourself a success, and you would have done all this without them. It's super hard look at Britney Spears! Tina Turner! Whitney Houston! Read Jemima J. its a lovely chick lit for motivation.Take a different class everyweek, cooking, wine, you'll be out, make new friends, enjoy life.